How to Vote When You Don't Know the Candidates

Here's how I do it:

The goal, ultimately: toss a wrench in the anger status quo machine. Here's how I fantasize that I have some affective effect...

  1. Always, always, always (despite what almost-winners say to you) vote for third party candidates where available.
  2. Vote for folks whose name sounds like...ah..."minority" names, then women, then children (jk...just seeing if you're reading).
  3. Vote Democrat (pathetic, wishy-washy posers are better than corporate-ass-kissing sadists)
  4. Vote 'no' whenever it asks if the judge or whatever should remain in office (remember the goal, People).
  5. Read the between the lines of the laws and add-on rules (whatever they're called), aiming to vote against pro-business-corporate laws and for pro-people-wildlife-wildland laws.
  6. Vote against laws, generally.

There it is...try it next time. It's fun.